I went for a walk yesterday, and like most walks, I had a destination in mind, I was, what I have jokingly said returning to the science of the crime.
It was one year ago, that I ran my first live race and broke actually shattered my leg. I was 20 feet from the end of the race when my ankle dislocated and shattered my fibula. In the days and weeks that followed, I asked the question of what did I do wrong? Was I too heavy to be running? Did I not train enough? Maybe the biggest question became was how am I going to keep my weight in check and how do I deal with my stress.
I have had a lot of people say to me since then so you are done with running right? You are done with races right? And honestly I never know how to answer them. I wish I could just go for a run. The truth is that I can barely walk a half mile without my leg starting to hurt. I know that it takes time to recover and I know from the break that I had it is going to be a long road.
I would probably have to be honest and say if I weighed 75 pounds less, my leg might not hurt at the half miles mark, maybe the pain would hold off till 3/4 of a mile or maybe even a mile.
Running wasn’t just a way to stay in shape, or keep my weight in check. But it was a way to clear my head, work through stress in my life and maybe most importantly it was where I wrote my stories.
You are like wait, what is she talking about? She has this blog, she writes her thoughts all the time. Nope, when I ran, I got story ideas and would work them out in my head. I can use music to change my mood and release my emotions. But running allowed time for me to think about other things and escape.
This blog was created because people asked if I would share some pieces that I wrote during the pandemic and was processing multiple changes in my life. This blog is a way to remind me that we need to be the best possible person we can be. This year I have focused a lot on how do we interact with others because there is so much negative that I feel like we need to keep fighting for positive outcomes.
The break changed a lot of things for me. I am still working through a lot of the changes and learning how to adjust to my new life post break. But I will tell you that I have not written off running, but I am sure if I can get back to it it will be very different then before.
Until next time,
Juli
Juli's Blog 