Escape plans

Some days are hard, I wish they weren’t. I wish I could wave a wand and take away the pain my friend is feeling. I wish I could help the person that is posting on Facebook that her kids are going hungry again tonight, but sadly I don’t have a fix for those things or any of the other crap that seems to be happening.

It has been a tough month, friends losing their spouses, health concerns for family members and not to mention trying to manage Christmas in the year of isolation.

You know it’s been a rough month when certain people names appear on your phone with a call or text and your brain says I don’t think I can take any more bad news. Guess what the bad news doesn’t care if you are ready for it or not it’s coming.

I went to appointment the other day and I had worked at all the possibilities in my head. And the doctor slowly and patiently ruled out every single scenario I had come up with. He gently tells me we have to run more tests.

Didn’t you hear me? I just told you what I need this to be… I can’t have be something else! I have just walked through a fog of the last two weeks with friends losing spouses, family members having major health problems. My brain fog became a little bit more foggy.

Okay so what do I do? I need an escape plan! Escape plans are vital you have to have one in place. This escape plan included a day of movies, and some popcorn and of course doggie snuggles. Sometimes the escape plan is just a song on repeat. The nice thing about digital music is you don’t have to worry about the cassette tape breaking from over use.

I looked at the song that got me through a different time in my life and according to the tracking I had played it over a 1000 times. I’m fine with that because I think it was around 1001 I started to heal.

Escape plans come in all different shapes and sizes and may not look the same two times in a row. The song that healed you last time may not even speak to you this time and that’s okay maybe this time it’s an art project that brings you through to the other side.

The point is that life is hard, so times so much harder than we think we can handle. We can handle we just have to figure out what are escape plan is.